Blue Moose - It’s a Dew-Lap song

Blue Moose 

Blue Moose

I saw you standing alone

You are a bull in a rut

Without a cow of your own 

Down by bog, you saw her there feeding

Her fur glistening in the dew

But little did you know that this mating season

That your bother was watching her too 

Blue MooseI saw you standing alone

You are a bull in a rut

Without a cow of your own 

You begged your brother

Please let her be mine

There’s lots of other cows in the sea

But your brother is of strong mind

And stronger bodyAnd said, “Let’s solve this traditionally” 

Blue Moose

You knew just what was in store for

You and your very own brother

Would have to fight for a lover 

He pushedYou shoved

And your antlers collided

And tangled so badly you couldn’t pull

Your antlers apart

So you stuck to your brother

And watched that cow leave with another bull 

Blue Moose

She knew just what you were there for

Too bad she couldn’t just care for

Either for you or your brother 

Blue Moose

Now you’re not standing alone

You’ve got your brother to moan

With for a cow of your own.

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Flemming the Lemming

Bend and ear and listen while I sing

A song I wrote about a lemming

Who became so misunderstood

Sent to psychotherapy

For what the government thought was his own good.

Flemming was born in 1972

He was even featured on 'Hinterland's Who's Who'

A lemming population high that year gave rise

To a government concern

Of a lemming mass suicide

The therapist said "Now Flemming it's in your lemming genes

Your population fluctuation extremes

One year you're here in numbers so astronomical

But in a couple of years a lemming sighting is

Next to impossible."

And Flemming said:

Lemmings control the rhythm and the melody

Of the animals in the tundra I don't need therapy

The artic fox and the snowy owl depend of me

Some things in nature just need to remain a mystery

Then Flemming was presented with the cold hard facts

No other animal population crashes so low so fast

On the brink of extinction every four years

Total extirpation from the arctic

Is what the government fears.

Now rumours travel swiftly in the tundra and we've heard

That every fourth year lemmings think that they're birds

In this avian delusion like a migrating flock

Off a coastline cliff, take a run for it and

Spread the lemming wings that they don't got

And Flemming said:

It seems to me that you should be the one in therapy

To suggests and to believe in such an absurdity

I am Canadian true north strong and free

Any population fluctuations in lemmings

Happen naturally

I do appreciate all this government concern

With all due respect you have so much more to learn

About the intricate relations that keep us alive

In the changing arctic tundra,

Only the strong survive.

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Ptarmigan Song

You are a hardy member of the grouse family

You scurry cross the snow in your feathered feet

Your plumage changes three time count’ em 1-2-3

But why do you spell Ptarmigan with a P? 

Derived from a Scottish Gaelic It’s a funny word

Pronounce the T but not the P It’s never heard

It’s really quite confusing but it not that rare

There are animals with silent letters everywhere! 

Who put the D in badger?

What’s with the B in lamb?

Why is a W in Wren?

And Y tell me Y

Can it B I don’t C

Is there a P tell me again In Ptarmigan? 

You feed on arctic vegetation all day long

You roost during the night or when the winds are strong

Your population fluctuation’s cyclical

Like lemmings and the lynx it’s inexplicable… 

Explain to me the silent P ptarmigan

Its really been perplexing me time and time again

I guess you’re not alone and you’re not to blame

There are lots of other animals with funny names 

What’s with the G in Gnu?

Who put two L’s in Llama?

Who put that O in leOpard

And Y tell me Y

Can it B I don’t C

Is there a P tell me again In Ptarmigan 

You line your nest with grasses, feathers and lichen

A clutch of eggs is laid by a likened hen

And teeny tiny ptarmigan hatch with glee…YIPEE!

Until they find out that their name’s spelled with a P

Until they find out that their name’s spelled with a P

Until they find out ptarmigan’s spelled with a P!

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The Tamarack Song

CHORUS: 

Tamarack, Hackmatack, Juniper, and Larch

Absolutely naked from November until March

It's got CONES! and it's got NEEDLES!

But it isn't what it seems...

It's decidedly deciduous and never evergreen

Next time you're outside playing and there's a tamarack in sight

Why don't you get up close and notice what the needles are like?

They grow in little bunches that look just like tiny brooms

If you were only a couple inches tall, you could use one to sweep your room!

Now, if there was a party that only softwoods could attend

And the invitation said that you could bring along a friend

The tamarack would never ask a taller tree to come

'Cause taller trees are too shady, and larches love their sun!

I suppose you all are wondering what "deciduous" really means

Well, in the season we call "autumn", you can see the falling leaves

The beautiful Red Maple may be the one that we know best

But the larches drop their needles too, so they also pass the test!

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Night Shift

At nighttime the sun doesn't shine
For some creatures it's wake up time
They're nocturnal if you catch my drift
It's time to hunt and feed and play
And time to start another crazy day
They're living in the Night Shift

These are the animals that come out at night
Nocturnal animals give us quite a fright
The more we know about them the more we care
That they're there
And there's no need to be scared

I'm gonna sing you some musical clues
And from these clues you gotta pick and choose
The nocturnal animal I'm talking about
Think real hard about what comes out at night
And when you've thought of the animal you know is right
Wait for the stop!
And then shout it out!

These creatures live in the sea
They open up clams to find the meat
They've got five arms
They're superstars
They can't move fast so they feed at night
And if they lose an arm when they get in a fight
They can grow it back
Do you know what they are?

SEASTARS!

This creature has been labelled a pest
And those with campsites will know it best
They're masked bandits
With a practiced skill
When nighttime comes they hit the street
With their human-like forepaws finding food to eat
You gotta respect Ole Rocky's will

RACCOONS!

This insect's like a butterfly
It's got 6 legs and 2 antennae
It can smell its mate from 1 mile away
For some of its life it's in a cocoon
That hatches out underneath the moon
To feed on nectar ‘til the break of day

MOTH!

This creature is known for its call
Amphibians so loud wouldn't seem so small
Its nighttime symphony just makes me weep
It lives in the marshes and it lives in the bogs
It's from a family we call Chorus Frogs
An in the springtime you can hear it PEEP

SPRING PEEPER!

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The Yak Song

I am a beast of burden
I am nimble I am certain
Sure-footed and stable on the track
I am shaggy I am woolly
I have horns but I'm no bully
I can climb the highest mountains I am yak

I have served men since I can remember
I march from January to December
Through the mountains of the far east with a pack
In the cold and sparsely vegetated
I'm the only known domesticated
Mammal, not even a camel, I am Yak

Clickity Clack
Clickity Clack
I am Yak
I am Yaaak

I have great lung capacity
Better than a Canadian Mountie
You can count on me, I am Yak

Milk beef wool and leather too
You can heat your cabin with my poo
Or use my hair to make yourself a cat
I'll carry your bags, I'll carry your laundry
But I won't carry you so don't get on me
Cause I'll toss you off a mountain, I am Yak.

Clickity Clack
Clickity Clack
I am Yak
I am Yaaak

I thrive in higher altitudes
I produce milk but I do not Moo
And my poo can heat your home, I am Yak

12 million domestic Yaks
Fulfilling all their daily tasks
Unlike their kin, the wild Yaks of Tibet
In the plateaus way up in the sky
These rare wild Yaks retreat to hide
So endangered I have not seen one yet

Clickity Clack
Clickity Clack
I am Yak
I am Yaaak

So few Yaks left in the wild
Without your help we'll be exiled
And we've helped you for so long help us back.
I hope you liked my song I am yaaaaak.

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Plover Song

Peep lo Peep lo Peep lo Everybody Go

Where are you Piping Plover
I hear you but I can't decipher
Where you stand in the sand
On seashore where my eyes do scan

Show yourself Piping Plover
Ooh you're good at going undercover
You're so motionless against the beach
Are you far away or within my arm's reach?

Peep lo Peep lo Peep lo Everybody Go

You're so cool Piping Plover
Too cool for that forest cover
You spend your nights right under the stars
In a nest you scrape on sandy bars

I see you Piping Plover
You are courting your new lover
You sing and dance up in the sky
And you wonder will she walk on by

You fan your feathers and put on quite a show
You scrape the sand and sing your best Peep LO!

Peep lo Peep lo Peep lo Everybody Go

Well she must have loved you Piping Plover
Cause soon she'll be a plover's mother
And the ploverhood that plays before
Your mind's eye on a nest of four

One two three four piping plovers
Scurry round you while you hover
Close to them standing guard
Cause you understand Plover life is hard

Look out for gulls and crows and dogs and those raccoons
And ATV's and storms like big monsoons.

So fragile are you Piping Plover
So exposed and so uncovered
You're a sitting duck for falling prey
To so many threats of the modern day

We're here to save you Piping Plover
From near extinction we'll recover
Your population will surely grow
Through education and singing out Peep Lo!

Peep lo Peep lo Peep lo Everybody Go

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The Goshawk Song

I would like to tell you about a lesson I learned The hard way' through experience Like getting sunburned When you knew it was sunny Now you just look funny And it hurts to take a bath I've been coming to Kedge oh for many a year For the Mersey tea, the petroglyphs and the white-tailed deer But I was more than disappointed And admittedly disjointed When they closed my favourite trail Oh my gosh there's a roadblock At the head of the Hemlocks And Hardwoods trail My heart grows pale Now where the heck am I gonna walk I asked a Park Interpreter hey what's with the closure She said the trees were threatened from overexposure Such a main attraction Suffers too much soil compaction From the footprints of a million feet. She said it would reopen in 2004 A trail would be constructed to shield the forest floor With new protective boardwalks To guide me through hemlocks An old growth habitat That made sense to me so I waited patiently Walking flowing waters until I became dizzy But this summer rolled around and to H and H I'm bound! I declared happily. Oh my gosh there's a roadblock At the head of the Hemlocks And Hardwoods trail My heart grows pale Interpreters are just all talk! My mouth dropped to the ground when I saw the trail was roped off A new sign posted, but suddenly it fell off Oh well I said I'll march ahead And ran until my face was red Just like that silly sunburn The trail was so amazing I was quite impressed It certainly should be open and enjoyed by the rest My blissfulness peaked When I heard the piercing shriek From a Banshee in the trees Oh my gosh it's a Goshawk Coming for me on the Hemlocks And Hardwoods trail It is hot on my tail And I'm thinking thank God for these Boardwalks I should have read that trail sign Warned that the Goshawk would align My head with its talons If he saw me coming Now he's coming for me on a beeline. Take it from me you better read trail signs.

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Black Bear in the Hood

Hey There
Big Black bear
In the hood
Please beware
People round
These parts
Well they don't all have
Big Bear hearts

Big Black Bear
I don't find you frightening
It's so rare
To have a black bear sighting
What makes me shiver
And shake with worry
Is that you're not at all
Afraid of me.

So confused and misunderstood
Is a Black bear in the hood.

Yes I know
It's a big bad world
Loneliness
And hunger swirls
Through your deep
Sacred rest
Winter sleep
You awake famished

I never meant
To be inviting
You caught a scent
You found so delighting
Cold wet spring
Did impede
The food source
You naturally eat

So confused and misunderstood
Is a Black bear in the hood.

It's my fault
I am accountable
For the smelly trash
It's insurmountable
To expect
Your big black nose
To ignore smells like those

Big Black Bear
You gotta heed my warning
Run away
Cause I don't want to be mourning
Another senseless bear deceased
On the fine line
Between man and beast

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